Elder Abuse happens far more often than you can imagine, and most of it goes unseen. If you have a parent in a nursing home, it is important to stay aware of the signs of elder abuse.

It is final, all of the options have been exhausted and you need to find convalescent care for your parent. You do your research to find the best care at the most affordable price. There are so many decisions to be made; whether to sell the house or rent it; what to do with all his personal belongings. You hardly have time to think about how the changes in his life will affect you and your family.

After a lot of hard work, all of the arrangements have been made. Your parent is finally moved to a care facility. The convalescent home seems to be a good enough option. It has parakeets, a fish tank, and there are weekly visits with therapeutic animals. The preschool across the walkway even visits, and the children play games with the elders. Specially planned activities include Bingo and other pleasant weekly events. Concert and visits from religious clergy are also scheduled weekly.

After the move and all the arrangements you’ve had to make, your emotions are too unsettled to consider the possibility of abuse. However, after a couple of weeks, your parent is extremely uneasy. The discomfort does not seem to originate with the recent changes in his living situation. Although he was sad about the move, he seemed to adjust well and even make a few friends. But if your parent still seems uneasy then it is probably time to have a serious talk and get to the root of the problem.

If you suspect that your loved one is being abused, it is time to become a bit of a detective. Show up for visits at unexpected times. Get to know the day and overnight staff by name and talk to them often. It is crucial to be pleasant but firm when discussing issues with your loved one’s care. The adage “do unto others as you would have them do to you,” is a very good practice at this time. You will need to be sure they are open to your questions and calls.

During your visits, look for the following indications of abuse:

• Uneasiness or Fear
• Withdrawal or Silence
• Sprains or broken bones
• Unusual weight loss
• Unsanitary conditions
• Dirty or unbathed

There are different types of abuse, any one of them will seriously affect the health of your loved one. Here is a short list that includes the different types of abuse and a brief description.

Emotional Abuse

• Your loved exhibits behavior that is much like dementia, but has no history of dementia.
• Your loved one tells you about abusive behavior, or you witness it.

Neglect

• Weight loss, dehydration or malnutrition.
• Untreated bed sores.
• Bedding is not regularly changed.

Physical Abuse

• Unexplained welts, bruises, scabs or scars
• Dislocated joints, sprains or broken bones.
• Hearing aids not properly put in the ear.
• Failure to administer medication (the prescription is not used).

Sexual Abuse

• Bruises near breasts or genitals.
• Venereal disease or genital infections.
• Vaginal or anal bleeding.

In conclusion, if you have monitored your loved one and have evidence or strongly suspect that abuse could be happening, it is time to take action. There is a possibility that you will need to seek legal assistance to correct the problem. Be assured, elder abuse is illegal. You can obtain an attorney; there is legal recourse for abuse.